I am feeling frustrated with this project in that I want to get to the intervention and make a thing to solve the problem but I don’t even know what the problem is.
I want to say- “It’s an APP” “It’s a virtual assistant funeral planner!” “It’s a Tesla Hearse!” ‘It’s a board game!” but there is still so much territory to cover to seems like we might never get there.
One thing our group has discussed is looking less towards end of life and towards life transitions which is an interesting direction. But I feel like I am having difficultly managing time well enough to wrap my head around. I feel like I’m not making much progress, not doing enough readings, not documenting enough. Last semester I felt guilty if I enjoyed myself and felt a continuous pressure to be completely consumed by course work and I doubt this semester will be different.
This evening my teammates met to play the game Hello — which is about having “conversations about what matters” and I’m realizing how awful some of the conversations around life transitions can be. I have a terrible relationship with my family and I was really deflated when we did certain questions — one was “what three people would be your proxy if you couldn’t make decisions” and I don’t have three people in my life I would be close enough to make that call. Probably my mother I guess. The answer to another Hello question was such a painful memory (literally) I had to pass on answering all together. I’d rather talk about death than the bad parts of being alive.
I’m imagining volunteers playing this game for us to watch and feeling a bit uncomfortable about it. We discussed giving participants the option of flagging questions they don’t wish to answer and I think that should be the appropriate handling.
I was worried I would interview someone and ask them a question and they would feel shit — but I guess even asking the question made me feel shit. I don’t know if I have the kind of sensitivity towards myself or others to handle some of the questions we may need answered to understand life transitions.
